Absolute Power
By Kristen
On April 21st, after several prolonged strikes and weeks of massive pro-democracy demonstrations in Kathmandu, Nepal’s notorious King Gyanendra relinquished his claim to totalitarian rule in favor of a previously-elected parliament. It was an unqualified victory for The People and a good sign for the future of the tiny Himalayan nation, which has long been a hot mess of oppression, poverty, and the occasional civil war.
To commemorate the turnover, CNN.com ran the following headline:
“Nepal’s king gives up absolute power.”
It was a great news caption, especially for that particular website, which tends to post journalistic coups like “Teri Hatcher injured on ‘Housewives’ set,” and “Killer chimp burst through window, bit off hand” (both from Wednesday, 4/26/06). Punchy and informative, it made me read the article, wherein I learned that King Gyanendra really did say (and this may be slightly paraphrased), “Suckas, you can start governing yo’ damn selves. I’m bad at this.”
The best part about CNN’s banner, though: it made me re-examine the concept of absolute power, and refuted three long-standing beliefs I had about the nature of political omnipotence. Take a look…
MYTH: Absolute power is a gift from on high.
FACT: You just have to want it.
I always presumed that obtaining absolute power was like having blue eyes or being able to turn invisible; a simple matter of genetics, god, or driving your spaceship through cosmic rays. I had no idea you could simply declare it, and whenever you gave an outlandish order (death to dissenters, only brown M&Ms, etc.) everyone around you would say, “Well, he did say he had absolute power.”
In King Gyanendra’s case, he assumed supreme dominion in February 2005 after a series of insurgencies, “Y’know, until things get better.” Most books say this is a colossally bad idea, particularly if you have a tendency to shoot civilians when they become annoying. However, it does open up new career paths for those not happy with their place of employment. Burger-flippers, latte-slingers, assistant producers - you’re one declarative statement away from turning this whole thing around, baby.
MYTH: Absolute power is permanent, whether you like it or not.
FACT: You don’t want it? Heave-ho that bad boy.
I figured once a ruler had absolute power, it was his forever; that, “This job sucks. I don’t want to do it anymore,” was a valid reason for quitting Sears, not sovereignty. It turns out, CNN’s headline was right. Total control is like virginity: you can give it up whenever you want, but there are no guarantees anyone will respect you in the morning. Especially if you are still wearing this hat:
MYTH: “Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely."
FACT: Absolute power is only mostly corruptive.
I was taught that once a leader assumed full-on monocratic rule, his soul turned black as pitch; a viscous ebony coagulate that no infinitesimal ray of goodness could penetrate. Turns out, I was wrong about that, too. Though thousands of Nepalese were killed or unjustly imprisoned during Gyanendra’s reign, he allegedly still kinda likes his wife, children, and warm summer days.
Oh, and bunnies. Can’t forget the bunnies.
In the end, it seems to have been thoroughly unwise for King Gyanendra to claim absolute power in the first place. Besides that whole part about it being calamitous for his people, it’s a tricky, tricky entity - difficult to wield, terrible to be subjected to, and easily confused with divine rights by thick Americans.
posted by Kris at
1:28 PM
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